JOAN COLLINS BROWN

Have you ever found a gorgeous dress, or top and stopped yourself from buying it because it was sleeveless? I've been there so many times, until I started looking at clothing differently than how it was displayed on a mannequin. As many of you know, I'm LDS and we practice a level of modesty in our religion. After I went through the Temple a week prior to getting married I never considered how much I would be reminded of my choices simply by picking out an outfit everyday. Sure, I think I was always pretty modest in my day to day life before being endowed in the Temple. I'll even make a bold statement and say that I was probably one of the most modest among my group of friends at school, but there is a huge difference between: "I shouldn't wear that", and "I can't wear that".  Modesty isn't something I really struggle with, but I think its mainly due to how I see clothing. I don't have a desire to wear tight clothes, or anything short or low cut. However, there comes a time when I have to think outside the box.

Take this dress I'm wearing as an example. It is absolutely beautiful, and if it wasn't for it being sleeveless it would be a modest dress in my opinion. I learned to love layering pieces together and not see it as a burden, but simply as a fashion choice. For this dress I wanted to keep its feminine design by giving it a preppy twist and added a collared blouse. This is just one example of what can be done. Another trick of mine is to add a skin tone t-shirt (preferably) tight fitting underneath anything sheer. You will be modest but still keeping the integrity of the design.

I know it can be frustrating when we are looking for a dress for a wedding or an event. You can't seem to find anything that works and you might give up and let our values slip. I want to tell you there is always a way to keep your modesty without having to conform. We should start getting in the habit (myself included) to remember clothing can be altered to fit you. You can always cut fabric and add it on. Perhaps the dress is too long and a seamstress and make sleeves from that material. I can remember being a teenager and seeing my friends wearing more revealing tops and shorts; which wasn't wrong, but I personally never felt comfortable in those clothes. I had to realize I had my own style and to stick to it to make myself happy instead of making it more about everyone else. Sure, I was teased about my "grandma" style, but I had to wear them and my feelings are all I care about when I get dressed. At the end of the day, as long as you are comfortable in what you are wearing that is what truly matters. Thanks so much for stopping by. Please share with me your experiences with modesty.  Is it something you struggle with? Do you care about it? Do you have your own tricks and tips? With love, Joan